“A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, savings smaller, and a home happier.” – Anonymous
WHEN you become a parent, the world around you shifts in ways you never quite anticipate.
Suddenly, your priorities take on a new shape – what once seemed important now feels like a distant memory, and what used to be optional becomes non-negotiable.
Expenses, for instance, no longer revolve around you or your partner.
They are centred firmly on one very small but very important person: your child.
Before my son arrived, I thought I had a good handle on budgeting.
My husband and I were careful with our spending, and we liked to think of ourselves as practical people.
If we wanted something, we’d ask ourselves, “Do we really need this?”
Most of the time, the answer was no, and we’d walk away.
These days, the same question has a new variation: “Will this make life better, safer, or easier for the baby?”
More often than not, the answer is yes – and just like that, what used to feel like a luxury turns into a necessity.
It’s not just us either.
Parenthood has a ripple effect that extends to grandparents, especially when it’s their first grandchild.
My parents and in-laws, who once kept a close eye on their own expenses, now seem to have discovered a whole new level of generosity.
Every shopping trip somehow ends with a bag containing tiny clothes, rattles, or picture books.
They call it “just a small thing for the baby”, but the small things add up, and I can already see how this child will never be short of love – or toys.
There’s something heartwarming in it, of course.
For the grandparents, shopping isn’t just shopping – it’s an expression of joy and pride, a way of leaving their imprint on this new little life.
For us, it’s both a relief and a reminder.
Relief, because their contributions lighten the load.
Reminder, because even with their help, parenthood comes with a long list of must-haves we never even knew existed until recently.
Take the baby expo my husband and I visited on Wednesday (September 24).
We went with the best of intentions. “We’re just going to look,” we told ourselves, determined to exercise restraint.
But the moment we walked into the shopping mall’s ground floor, lined with rows of stalls stacked high with diapers, wipes, formula, and baby gear – colourful balloons floating above – we knew our plan to “just look around” was about to be tested.
At first, it was harmless.
A great deal on diapers and wipes caught our attention, and we reasoned that stocking up was only practical.
After all, if there’s one thing a new parent quickly learns, it’s that you can never have too many of either.
By the end of the day, we were carrying more shopping bags than we had planned, our wallets noticeably lighter.
On the drive home, we laughed about it, half-amused and half-shocked at how quickly “just looking” had turned into a mini shopping spree.
My husband shook his head and said, “They really know how to get us, don’t they?”
But deep down, we both knew it wasn’t clever marketing alone – it was the pull of parenthood.
And it doesn’t stop at expos.
Even at home, our front porch has become a revolving door for delivery riders.
Every few days, another parcel arrives, and without fail, it’s always something for the baby – clothes in the next size up, new bottles, extra swaddles, or yet another gadget promising to make parenting easier.
Online shopping has become an extension of the baby aisle, and while it is convenient, it also means the little one is at the centre of every purchase, every click, and every doorstep delivery.
Every item suddenly carries a weight it never used to.
A bottle steriliser isn’t just a machine; it’s peace of mind.
A soft play mat isn’t just a piece of fabric; it’s a safe space for our child’s first wobbly attempts to crawl.
Even the mountain of diapers and wipes stacked in our cupboard feels like security.
What might have seemed like overindulgence in our pre-parent days now feels justified, even essential.
In many ways, I count us lucky.
We are financially comfortable enough to say yes to these purchases, to stock up when deals are offered, and to indulge in the little extras that make parenting less stressful.
But that comfort also makes me pause and think about parents who may not have that option – those who must weigh every pack of diapers against a week’s groceries or choose between baby gear and other pressing bills.
For them, the joy of parenthood is often accompanied by an undercurrent of financial stress.
And while we walked out of the expo with arms full of bags, I know that for many others, walking away empty-handed is the reality, not the choice.
The truth is, parenthood reframes everything.
Money, time, energy, even our dreams—everything bends toward this new centre of gravity.
The old version of us would have thought twice about splurging at an expo or ordering multiple parcels in a week.
The new version doesn’t just think about now, but about what will help tomorrow, next week, or next month.
And the funny thing is, even with the occasional shock of an expo bill or another unexpected delivery, we wouldn’t have it any other way.
Because while the expenses pile up, so too does the love, the laughter, and the memories we make along the way.
But it also reminds me that not every parent has the same cushion, and maybe that’s where society can do more – whether through family support, community help, or better policies – to make sure all parents, regardless of income, feel the security of knowing their child has what they need.
Parenthood may change priorities and reshape wallets, but it should never take away the simple right of every child to be cared for, cherished, and provided for.
The views expressed here are those of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of Sarawak Tribune. The writer can be reached at sarahhafizahchandra@gmail.com.
