EVERY Friday, my column appears in print.
Over the years, this space has allowed me to share stories from assignments, reflections from my travels, lessons learnt from remarkable individuals and, occasionally, snippets of my own life.
This week, however, is a little more personal.
As this column appears in today’s newspaper, my son Rafael is celebrating his first birthday.
It is hard to believe that an entire year has passed.
A year ago, I was preparing to meet a little boy I had only known through blurry ultrasound scans, tiny kicks and endless guesses about what he might look like.
When I look at Rafael today, it is almost impossible to reconcile him with the sleepy newborn we brought home from the hospital.
These days, he rarely stays still.
He has developed strong opinions about almost everything, especially when it comes to deciding whether he wants to sit in his stroller or be set free to explore, and whether the food placed in front of him is worthy of his approval.
He has also started to master the art of negotiation – albeit entirely in baby language.
It usually happens during bath time, when he passionately pleads for “just five more minutes” in his tub through a combination of enthusiastic babbling, dramatic gestures and the occasional splash.
Somehow, despite not understanding a single word, we always know exactly what he is trying to say.
He has discovered that cupboards deserve to be emptied, shoes should never stay where they belong, and every drawer in the house probably contains hidden treasure.
Somewhere along the way, our little baby quietly became a little boy.
Over the past year, we have celebrated countless firsts – his first smile, first laugh, first tooth, first steps and, before we knew it, his first little run.
Like most parents, I have become that person whose phone storage is permanently full of thousands of photographs and videos.
People always tell new parents that childhood passes in the blink of an eye. It sounded like one of those well-meaning clichés, but now I understand.
The days can feel endless, yet somehow the year disappeared before I was ready for it.
As Rafael’s birthday approached, I found myself making the same joke repeatedly.
“Well… I actually managed to keep a tiny human alive for an entire year.”
People laughed, and so did I, but there was genuine amazement behind the joke.
Before Rafael, I could barely keep a houseplant alive.
Give me a breaking news story, a deadline or a special report and I knew exactly what to do.
Hand me a potted plant and there was a very good chance it would be struggling within weeks.
So, surviving our first year together feels like an achievement worth celebrating.
Of course, it has not always been easy.
There were sleepless nights, endless laundry and moments when I questioned whether I was doing things right.
Just when you think you’ve figured them out, babies change again.
Perhaps that is parenthood’s greatest lesson – you are not raising the same child every month. They are constantly becoming someone new.
Looking back, one of my favourite memories from this past year was travelling with Rafael.
Last week, we went to Phuket for his birthday trip and a much-needed break from life in Kuching.
The last time we flew internationally, Rafael was just six months old and he wanted to be carried almost the entire trip.
Six months later, we found ourselves chasing a determined almost-one-year-old around airports and in airplanes because all he wanted to do was explore.
We let him do his own thing, including getting up close and personal to inspect the airplane’s carpet, as well as almost escaping into the business class cabin.
He smiled at strangers as though they were old friends and happily reached out to anyone who smiled back.
It was exhausting and chaotic, but somehow it was also wonderful because we were watching him discover the world with endless curiosity.
One of my favourite moments was watching him make a new friend at our resort’s kids club. Neither of them spoke the same language, yet within minutes they were smiling, hugging, waving and playing as if they had known each other forever.
It reminded me that children enter the world without prejudice or fear. They do not care where someone comes from, what language they speak or what differences adults see between them. They simply see another child to laugh with.
I hope Rafael never loses that innocence.
More than that, I hope he carries that same fearlessness through life – the courage to step into unfamiliar places with curiosity instead of hesitation, to greet people with kindness before judgement, and to believe there is always something to learn from the people he meets.
As Rafael celebrates his first birthday today, he will not remember the sharks and stingrays at Aquaria, the birthday holiday we took or the countless photographs we filled our phones with.
I hope that every year, wherever life takes us, we find a way to celebrate his birthday by discovering somewhere new together.
Not because travelling is the greatest gift we can give him, but because shared experiences become lifelong memories.
One day, when he is old enough to understand, I hope he realises that behind every birthday adventure were two parents who worked a little harder, planned a little earlier, and saved a little more because giving him experiences mattered more to us than giving him things.
He may not remember every hotel, every flight or every attraction we visited, but I hope he always remembers how deeply he was loved.
I hope he grows up knowing that every decision we made, every sacrifice we made and every birthday we celebrated was driven by one simple reason: we wanted him to know that he has always been, and always will be, our greatest adventure.
Happy first birthday, Rafael.
We can’t wait to see where year two takes us.’
The views expressed here are those of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of Sarawak Tribune. The writer can be reached at sarahhafizahchandra@gmail.com.
