FOR Abang Usop Abang Narudin, every day is a celebration of fatherhood, not just the annual reminder marked on calendars each June.
At 64, the retiree from Miri spoke softly but with deep conviction as he recalled a life shaped by joy, sacrifice and the quiet strength of a father’s love.
During a recent interview in conjunction with Father’s Day, Abang Usop struggled to hold back his tears when speaking about his three children, two daughters and a son, now all grown, with families and careers of their own.
“My children often video call. Not every day, of course, they’re busy with work. But at least once or twice a week, they will call and ask how I’m doing, whether I’ve eaten or taken my medication,” he says, eyes welling with emotions.
“That’s enough to make me feel remembered.”
His journey as a father began on the eve of Chinese New Year in 1983. His eldest son was born at the old Miri Hospital , the one that used to stand across the Miri River.
The birth, he recalled, was complicated.
“My wife was already overdue by a week. No contractions, no injections. We were worried,” he said.
“We took her to the hospital around 3:00 pm. By 9:00 pm, the baby arrived, with the help of forceps. It was Dr Michael Teo who delivered him. Back then, they didn’t even have the machines to monitor the baby’s condition.”
Abang Usop still remembers how the birth of his son fell just one day after his own birthday on February 11.
“It felt like a gift,” he said with a smile.
His second child, a daughter, was born in 1989, also at the old hospital, while the youngest arrived in 1997 at the current Miri Hospital, which opened in 1995.
Being a father in the 1980s, he said, came with its own set of challenges.
“It was exciting, of course, but it also demanded a lot of patience. As a husband and father in Islam, you are the imam, the leader of the family. That comes with great responsibility,” he added.
Working shift hours for much of his career meant that Abang Usop was often away from home. The bulk of parenting duties fell on his late wife, whom he credited entirely for their children’s achievements.
“She was the one who raised them, who was there after school, who made sure they were taken care of. I was mostly out earning a living,” he said, adding, “but thankfully, all of them turned out well.”
Indeed, his pride is palpable.
His second child, a daughter, was awarded a full scholarship by PETRONAS to pursue her studies in mechanical engineering and went on to work with the energy giant for five years.
Another child works as a pharmacist in the government health service.
Two of his children are now parents themselves. Today, Abang Usop is not only a father but also a grandfather to nine grandchildren.
He remains deeply connected to his children and insists on allowing them the freedom to carve their own paths.
“I never forced them into anything. They chose their careers, their futures. And I think that’s important. You can guide them, but you shouldn’t control them,” he said.
He offered a word of advice to new parents navigating today’s technology-driven world: monitor your children’s screen time.
“Gadgets can be useful, but they shouldn’t be a substitute for real connection,” he said
“Spend time with them. Talk to them. It’s hard, especially when both parents are working, but human interaction is what shapes a child’s values.”
Reflecting on the years gone by, Abang Usop spoke with a quiet dignity, a man who did his best, loved deeply, and raised children who carried his legacy forward.
“People say Father’s Day is once a year. But for me, every day is Father’s Day. The love, the concern, the bond, it doesn’t begin or end with a date,” he opined.
As he leant back in his chair, a gentle smile played on his lips. It was the smile of a father who knew he had done something right.
